I get this question a lot. People wonder, “Is this a lot like consulting? Is it therapy?” To put it simply, imagine that you don’t know how to ride a bike and you’re looking for some help to learn. You’ve tried in the past without success to ride that bike. If you hire a therapist to help you, she might say, “Okay, put the bike down, let’s go over here in the grass, and let’s really talk about all of the times in the past you’ve tried and failed to ride that bike. Let’s understand what’s happened by looking back.” When you talk to the consultant, the consultant will say, “Here’s a written guide with all of the details and the specifics about how to ride a bike. Follow these steps exactly as they are, and you will succeed.” The consultant hands you the manual, says, “Good luck,” and leaves. The mentor might say, “I’m going to get on my bike, and you get on your bike. Follow me and just do exactly what I’m doing. If you do what I do, you should be able to ride your bike.”
The coach is a little bit different. She says, “Get on your bike. I’m going to hold you up on your bike and run beside you while you get a feel for riding and a sense of what works for you with this bike. I’m going to continue to run beside you as you’re working it through and help you think about that. And when it feels like you’ve got it, I’m going to let go, but I’m going to still be with you. I’m going to be running alongside you.”
I think this metaphor really works well because an executive coach’s job is not to be the expert but to ask the questions, and to be really curious in a way that helps the client explore their own way to the answers. The client is the expert on themselves and how to best respond to their unique leadership challenges in a work environment. But sometimes, people need to be asked the questions and offered the frameworks or tools that will result in growing their leadership. Great leaders benefit from a thought partner in forging the path forward. The Coach’s role is to provide collaboration and guidance for a client to think through difficulties and obstacles, leverage their inherent strengths and gifts, and ultimately move the client to come up with solutions that come from a place of integrity and feel authentic.
